Life is a funny thing

Life in general is a crazy thing. We make plans, we work as hard as we can to get somewhere in life, then something comes along and throws us a completely different direction that we didn't expect. This week has been a trial on my mind and soul. I have been forced to search inward and look at my self and problems in my life as well as look at the things that matter most to me. I've found things that once mattered and guided my life have become just things, and things I saw as simple and common have become the keystones of my life.
This weekend I am selling another one of my guns (sold one 2 weeks ago). My firearm collection has been the pride and joy of my life since I bought my first gun. I literally saw them as my reason to work. I would work for money to buy and shoot guns, that was it. So why am i selling them? I want to be debt free and be able to live without the stress of owing people money. My wife and I are not starving or close to loosing our house, I just cant stand to owe people money, so I'm selling whatever I haven't used recently, that includes some of my guns. I'm also selling the weapons collection I've been working on since 12, sai's, staffs, knives, police batons and so on. It's been rough to see your favorite things become just things. disillusionment is a hard thing.
secondly I have had a shitty week at work. I feel underpaid and over worked, but that's how 90% of Americans feel so I'm not alone. I've just been stressed, and the fact that my eye has been twitching for the last 5 days hasn't helped much. not to mention the lack of good sleep. I have been having bad dreams and waking up 4-10 times a night.
As I said before though the little things I took as common have changed to the things I value most. On Wednesday I got some bad news, that I don't want to talk about here, and when I came home I felt like absolute shit. my dog without missing a thing came up to me and gently put his head on my lap. that night he curled up next to me and just stayed there until I fell asleep. It's amazing how animals can pick up feelings. I haven't wanted to talk about my feelings this week to anyone, but my dog has been the greatest comfort I have ever had in a time of need. I've never seen my wife as common but this week she has exceeded every expectation I've ever had. she has been the most loving kind person you could ever ask for. I love that woman. and lastly swimming. I've always loved water, I do my best thinking while just floating in a pool, but this Thursday my wife and I went to the pool and I was able to put my mind back together in the 90 min we were there, just relaxing in the deep end.
It's strange the importance we put on things and how we think that we control our lives. We have very little control, and nothing material matters. as I was floating in the pool Thursday I had the thought, "The things that matter most in your life will always change, so never hold to something so tightly that you are afraid to let it go. Life is simple, yet reason and logic cannot explain why things happen the way they happen, for people are not logical. So be like water, when it is in a river it is the river. when water is in a glass it becomes the glass. Be like water and flow in and out of where you are meant to be." It might not make sense but trust me it was profound to me at the time.